Friday, September 3, 2010

Ben Roethlisberger, Dennis Dixon, Byron Leftwhich, Soap Opera, As the Quarterback Turns

If I were a wealthy man (which I am not) I would start a soap opera type show about the off season and preseason for the Pittsburgh Steelers. You know people would watch (I mean good lord, everyone watches the Jersey Shore) and I could make some more money. Everyone would blog about it (maybe) and twitter would be ablaze (probably not) with the scandal that the show would provide.

Today would probably be the season finale that would leave you hanging on the end of your seat and wondering what is going to happen next, but alas it is the end of the season. That is how they draw you in for the next season. Or so I have heard. I don't even know if Guiding Light is still on TV.

For real though, if you looked at what happened over the past couple of days you would think this was scripted. Lets run this down in soap opera form:

-Ben gets suspended for the first 4-6 games of the season.

-Last year's backup, Dennis Dixon is thought to improve on last year's one start against Baltimore where he almost brought the Steelers to a OT win over Baltimore, in Baltimore (he was the first to get with the girl).

-The Steelers trade for Byron Leftwhich (Oh no they didn't, what a plot turn)

-Mike Tomlin really didn't give an answer to who was going to start in week one so there was this thick feeling in the air as to if it was Byron or Dennis going to start (two people fighting over the same girl) with Chuck Batch being totally left out of the picture (lying in the weeds waiting to pounce, secretly in love with the girl)

-Dennis and Byron continued to fight until Chuck Batch made his move in preseason game number three. Chuck then wondered to the media why he wasn't given a chance (professing his love to the girl)

-Byron gets hurt in the final preseason game (taking himself out of the running for the girl) and Dennis is there to swoop in and in all likelihood will play week one (take that dream girl to the prom, or whatever).

-Reports are out that Byron will be out for a while (unable to go to the "prom") so he will not even get a chance.

-Byron comes out and said that he is still going to try and play despite a busted up MCL (trying to get that one dance with the girl).

-Ben, who has been forgotten, got good news when he will be back in four weeks (from Siberia where he was exiled to for six weeks but got and earlier flight just after the "prom" but will still try to make an impression on the girl)

From here the shot fades out to shots of Byron in a brace, DD reading his playbook and Chuck trying to figure out what he can do to get the chance and Ben dreaming of being back since players that had similar situations were not even sent to Siberia.

That is how you draw it out for next season. By my calculations the end of this "season" is the end of preseason. Tune in next season when we find out who gets the girl on "As the Quarterback Turns"

Was that a pretty lame attempt to get your interested? Yea, but I had a good time laughing at myself writing that. Kinda a timeline of what went on.

Here We Go.

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